Bucket List

Life is so incredibly short. And fragile. It is incredibly sad that we
only seem to remember that in light of huge natual disasters that kill
hundreds of thousands of people. I try to live my life in the most
positive way, savoring every moment. Enjoying it. Making every moment
count. It may sound cheesy, but that's the way it is: life is short
and limited. Like natural resources, it's finite. Like natural
resources, you want to use every minute most efficantly and get the
most bang for your buck. We tend to forget this.

In light of this ongoing movement towards making every moment count, I
have decided to start a "bucket list;" things that I want to do or
accomplish before I die.

One thing I have decided that I must do before I die is see Sufjan
Stevens preform live. He is an amazing artist who is so smart in how
he constructs melodies and has amazing, meaningful lyrics. My favorite
song by him is Chicago. There is something about watching him perform
the song live on YouTube videos. It is a sincerely amazing song, but
when he performs it, it is so much more raw and heart felt. It often
moves me to tears; it is such a beautiful song. My life will be
incomplete if I do not get to see him perform.

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The Simplicity of Twitter

I value Facebook and I believe that it is an incredibly important
tool, not just for social networking, but as an organizing tool
accessible to the masses. But, overall, I like Twitter better as a
social networking service.

The simplicity of Twitter is something worthy of awe. The entire
system is built around text messaging from mobile phones. You can
access almost every single feature (few, but powerful) of Twitter via
text message. You may choose to follow somebody and recieve text
message status updates and it's just as easy to update your status via
text. Facebook is so multifaceted that you can access very few
features via text message.

Twitter is meant for the dispursal of information. People use it to
microblog about their lives and also to share links to important and
current news and the like. And almost every large business or
celebrity has a Twitter as well as most politicians, etc. It is ideal
for groups and organizations. It's quite easy to tell hundreds of
people about the meeting coming up or the most recent news.

Like I said, the beauty of Twitter is it's simplicity. With Facebook,
it takes effort to set one up, update your profile information and
find all of your friends. A new Twitter account can be set up in a
matter of seconds and takes very little to maintain, making it ideal
for groups.

I'm obviously bias.

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Religion

This is not a referendum on all religions. I respect everybody whom is
religious and my opinion of religion is shaped through my own
experiences and beliefs as are all of our personal opinions are. All I
ask is that others respect my opinions and I would love to have a
discussion with you about religion and other various and sundry things
because I have an open mind and love talking about life, religion and
morality.

I cannot accept a religion that does not accept me.

I know that several different groups interpret the bible in different
ways, and some might be more accepting of my lifestyle, and even
though those who speak out against my lifestyle "choices" might be in
the minority (but because the extremeists seem to be the ones who get
the most media attention and traction), I still cannot accept it.

If "god" created me and he is perfect, and being a homosexual is
considered, through the interpretation of the bible by even a small
minority, to be imperfect, and %10 of people are homosexuals, "god" is
therefore imperfect because a %10 error rate is not perfection (at
least in my book).

To me, religion is about sacrifice. The people who deem themselves the
purest and truest believers make sacrafices in order to be true
christains. They have to sacrafice their freedom of thought because
they are taught to believe what the bible says instead of what their
brain or science might be saying. They put themselves in a box which
creates barriers that make it hard for them to interact with others of
differing belief systems.

What do I believe in, you might ask...

"Character is higher than intellect... A great soul will be strong to
live, as well as to think."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Ralph Waldo Emerson is certaintly a huge inspiration. Self Reliance.
That is what I believe in. I believe in the laws of nature and what I
can see, feel, touch, taste and smell. I'm a very sensory person, I
like facts and being able to have answers for relatively everything,
and be able to understand how things came to be. I cannot have faith.
I must see to believe and that is why I cannot be religious.

But then that begs the question: Let's say that half the world (at
least) is religious and believes in god (or gods). They must not all
be crazy. It's easy to feel superior to a small group of people
because of their faith, but when it's at least half of the globe, it's
a different issue.

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The Invisible Sheep

This is an assignment where I was asked to respond to some of the readings we have done in my global environmental politics class and I chose to respond to an article on one of my favorite theories, Garrett Hardin's Tragedy of the Commons.

The theory of the tragedy of the commons is an economic theory constructed by Garrett Hardin that says that as multiple individuals act in their own self interest, they will ultimately deplete a shared limited resource even when the implications of doing such are not necessarily in everybody’s best interest. He uses the analogy of sheep grazing on a common ground. Because the commons is a shared public space and it does not cost the farmer anything directly to let his (or her) sheep graze on that common property, it is in his best interest to have as many sheep as possible grazing on that common property, just as it is in every farmer’s best interest to maximize the amount of sheep that he (or she) allows to farm on the common ground. Grass is a renewable resource; it grows and replenishes quite quickly. But, when inordinate amounts of amount of sheep are grazing on that grass, the grass will not be able to replenish itself fast enough and the sheep will die because there is not enough grass for them to eat.

As somebody whom is interested in economics, politics and the way of the world, I love this idea and I also like to contrast it with the polar opposite, Adam Smith’s theory of the invisible hand. The theory of the invisible hand says that with the forces of self-interest, competition and the idea of supply and demand, resources will be able to be allocated smartly and will not be depleted too quickly.

We can use an analogy by one of my favorite professors, Yoram Bauman, to illustrate the difference between these two theories. Imagine a bus full of people driving at top speed towards a cliff. The theory of the commons says that the bus will go off the cliff no matter what we do, but with the theory of the invisible hand, the invisible hand is driving the bus. Nobody knows that it is there. Nobody knows what it is going to do or how it will act. The invisible hand may choose at the last second to swerve and miss the cliff completely. And nobody will know why. Because the hand is invisible.

I tend to believe in the both of these theories. I do not want to say that with our environmental problems we have a tragedy of the commons because people are greedy and take all of the resources they can without considering the implications, because if I believe that fully, then that means that there is no hope for us. But, I cannot fully believe in the theory of the invisible hand because I think that somebody has to make a conscious decision and decide to save the planet and then use their resources accordingly so that we can avoid going off the cliff. As I said, I stand somewhere in the middle, between these two theories, a hybrid shall we say. I think that I will call my version of the theory The Invisible Sheep.

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Thankful

There are so many things that I think all of us take for granted, and even though I may seem overly thankful sometimes, I am not even giving things or people adequate credit.

I may seem to drown most of my friends with compliments, appreciation and thanks, but having had a time of my life where I had no real friends and even the fake friends were few and far between, I know how lucky and privileged I am now. It is like the saying: you do not know true happiness until you have had true sorrow.

I am using my fabulous computer right now with about eight applications open. Pandora Radio, Mail, Address Book, iCal, Safari, iTunes, iPhoto, Word, Excel and Powerpoint. And I just emptied my trash. All at once. Technology is amazing. Elisha Otis. Elevators. All these simple little things that make life so much easier that we do not even think of. Would your modern life be possible without a cell phone, let alone a smart phone? I have about 250 gorgeous nature pictures that I downloaded from the internet that rotate every few minutes as my desktop. They are quite gorgeous pictures and they really make me happy. And whenever I look at my desktop it's a different picture. I just said the word internet. Hello. Now that is something that we all take for granted for sure. Everything we use, everything we do requires the internet. This blog would not be possible without the internet. I can update this blog via email, text or online.

I feel so lucky every day the be able to have access to so many different tools and technologies, and friends. I am so fortunate to have the life I have.

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Unload

I'm not mad at you. Just not feeling the fairness right now. And I'm
not standing up for myself. And the logistics... I don't know how'll
they'll work. I wasn't able to take a nap because I got our stuff, and
Im not sure I can walk into a safeway with an entire handle without
looking suspicious. How should I do this? Drop it off at your house
and then I go to the store? Help me here...

But of course you're taking a nap, so why bother.

I'm mad at myself. I take on too much because I want to save the
world. And you know me, I'm a perfectionist, and it's hard for me to
accept if it's not perfect.

I can't be all things to all people. As much as I'd like to think I am.

The bottle is not as big as I thought. Less obvious. I hope I didn't
wake you.

I love you. But I hate flakes and when I flake on people. Sigh.

Nothing like unloading on somebody...

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Got Them Connects

I am always told by my friends "gosh, [my name], you know EVERYBODY!" I do not think this is true. But obviously, my friends do since I get it a lot.

I feel so privileged. I know so many amazing people. I am uber involved. I am a part of several student organizations and a member of the senate of the student association where I go to college. I guess that is considered abnormal. I am so incredibly passionate about so many different things, and it is hard for me not to want to be really involved in all of those things. I love feeling like I'm a part of something huge, like I am making a difference. I would not have it any other way. I could not possibly imagine being any less involved in any of the organizations I am in. I guess not everybody else is the same way.

On Friday, I was invited by our student regent to join about fifteen other students in an off-the-record discussion with another regent of our university who also happens to be the CEO of a great upstanding company with an excellent record of sustainability and corporate citizenship. The discussion was centered around the affordability of education and financial aid. It was a great discussion because all of the students were very well spoken and educated on the issues facing our state as our governor has to deal with a huge budget shortfall. This woman, the regent, was incredibly down to earth and really a pleasure to meet. This woman was by no means dressed like a slob, but all of the students there were wearing button down shirts and nice blouses. Her simple clothing made us feel very comfortable and showed that she was one of us and on our level.

I have been working on a campaign to establish a sustainability fund on our college campus and we were able to meet with the student regent at our university, the president of the student association, the president of the graduate student association and the chair of the faculty senate to present our proposal. It was so amazing to be sitting at the table with so many influential leaders and have their feedback and support.

I have had these and several other great experiences because I have been involved in so many organizations. I know so many influential people and I have the deepest respect for all of them. Also, it is a great feeling to know that they have the deepest respect for me and my opinions.

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Prying Bitchy Eyes

You know what I'm talking about. Yeah, you. I'm talking about you. I'm
not innocent here either. We're all guilty of doing it.

That stare. That glare. (That rhymed... I did not mean for that to
happen, but it is cute, so I'll keep it.) On the workout equipment at
the IMA. In the locker rooms. On the street. In class. Everywhere.
People have a tendancy to stare at others who appear of act out of the
ordinary. You know me, I'm loud, even obnoxious at times. And I'm big
(not normal). Yeah. That's right. I weigh 400 pounds but I am working
out at the IMA. Doing situps and 45 minutes on the eliptical machine.
Maybe even playing squash with friends. Stare if you like. I don't
give a damn. You may be a 120 pound breadstick of an existance, but I
can actually work out on the eliptical machine. I know... A huge
person whom is mildly healthy? Could it be? It's like I'm an apple at
an orange convention. I stick out like a sore thumb. Good. Keep
watching. I may even do a trick.

I know why we do it, why we stare. It's basic human nature to want to
investigate what is out of the ordinary. It's a defense mechanism. I
accept that. I just don't give a damn. Fuck conformity. As one of my
good friends says, I critisize ideologies instead of conforming to
them. I want you to stare. And I will just smile back. I know I'm out
of the ordinary, but I like it.

Being "normal" must be such a boring existance.

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